Insulation in the Attic

Today, I had finally forced me to take a bath--it had been more than a week and I knew it was against my personal rules to be quite so stinky. So, as I was getting dressed, Asaph said to me from the other side of the curtain,
"Hey Havilah, wanna go in the attic?"
"Okay." No questions asked; I already knew I was the one to do it because of my amazing climbing skills. ;)
There's no floor in the kitchen and the hole to the attic is about two square feet. Ephraim had put a board over the wood that holds up the floor and a bucket upside down on top of that. I put on my shoes for some unknown reason, and am now simmering angrily at myself.
"How are you gonna get up?" Ephraim said.
"I'm gonna stare at it."
So I stared at it, and BAM the plan was there, more or less. The longer I stare at something I want to climb, the better my plan to get up becomes. I don't attack mindlessly!
"Here, you can step on my hand." Ephraim said.
I put my foot on his linked gloves that he held like when you're helping someone mount a horse.
I grabbed the board at the edge, happy to find that it would hold my weight. Ephraim stepped out of the way of my flailing feet.
Now, my elbow was stuck. It needed to come up so I could put my weight on it. I lowered myself again, moved my hand to make room for it, and got up again.
"Whoah, Havilah what are you doing?" Asaph said.
I could imagine them seeing just half of me and having no idea of my strategy--it definitely looked hopeless, but I had not a doubt.
Inside the attic, Ephraim handed up a roll of duct tape.
"You think that'll work?" He said through a hole that a pipe used to go through but I had accidentally taken off a moment ago.
"Uh, maybe... I mean, there's nothing really holding it there EXCEPT the duct tape, so it might just slip down again.
There was a short silence below.
"Here, I'm handing you the glue."
Man, that glue stinks.
"And the sandpaper. You scratch it up with the sandpaper and then put the glue on, and hold it together for thirty seconds."
After that, I yelled,
"Hey! Someone come back to the hole!"
Eventually Ephraim got there.
"Here's the duct tape," I said, reaching my arm down as far as I could without burying my face in insulation. "And the glue..." I reached down and reached up and then down again. "And the sandpaper... and the phone." I was using the phone to take pictures and light my way.
To get down, I put my feet over the side. We were surprised by a blizzard of insulation falling from my clothes and where I was sitting.
"Oops..." I said as I slipped down to grab hold by my hands.
The rest was easy, and I had the relief of knowing that lunch was already pretty much prepared. So I said to me, I'll sit me down and write ya'll/y'all a blog!
The End